The Importance of Bonding

by LeAnna Benn

I sent this article http://www.nymetro.com/news/features/15589/ out recently and some responded—“that’s not true. It’s just a NY phenomenon.”

I think the article highlights why abstinence education has to talk about bonding w/partners. Its not enough to avoid a disease, your mind is the most essential body part of sexuality. First experiences have lasting impact.

I teach about bonding as strongly or stronger than STDs because mental health shapes the outcome of your life more profoundly than a bout with Chlamydia or even HPV---unless in the relatively few cases where it kills you. In one demonstration that I do, I say, “Every time you have sex, you don’t get an STD and every time you have sex, you don’t get pregnant BUT every time you have sex, you do bond.” If you want to teach the importance of bonding, or first encounters, contact the Teen-Aid office.

The battle is not contraception for these kids (it’s already been lost in NYC schools), its confusion, lack of focus and killing of dreams by filling their minds with the search for new sexual highs.

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